So What If They Don’t Like Me
It is one of our prime needs to be liked and accepted by the people surrounding us. But, how much should it actually affect our state of mind? And most importantly, how well do we cope if someone doesn’t like us?
There will always be someone not liking us
No matter how sweet, funny, helpful, agreeable or pleasant you are as a person, you have to know that there will always be someone who will not particularly be into you. At a younger age, especially teenage, it can be a challenge to accept. However, as we grow older, we should be less and less bothered by people’s opinions about us. So, how much exactly should we be bothered by this?
The truth is we shouldn’t be bothered by this at all. There are a few reasons why this should be so.
1. People’s opinions are very subjective
One of the main reasons why we shouldn’t be bothered if someone doesn’t like us is that people act based on their own subjectivity. That is why it is important to be objective and analytical in this matter toward the situation.
When we approach the situation from a neutral point, we will notice how it is not our flaws that make us unlikable but other person’s inner struggles and their problems that are projected onto us.
2. The most important opinion is the one we have about ourselves
If we have a bad opinion about ourselves, we will tend to accept other people’s bad opinions about us. Subconsciously we will think “they are right”. The only way to end accepting lousy opinions from others is to face ourselves and see who we really are.
This is definitely not an easy task but it is a necessary part of self-growth. Can we be happy if we let everyone’s opinions run our lives?
We will be unhappy only as much as we let people influence us.
Few tips on handling people’s dislikes
- No matter how much you please others with your good personality and behavior, someone out there might still have a lousy opinion about you. And it is ok. Learn to accept it.
- Learn to observe from a neutral point why someone doesn’t like you. Is it because you really are a bad person (highly unlikely) or because the person who doesn’t like you has their own inner problems? Can you notice if that person isn’t happy and that is why they are mean to other people?
- If someone crosses the line by disrespecting or humiliating you in public, be sure to stop them and not allow their mistreatment. It is one thing to notice how they feel about you, but completely another to be bullied. Be sure to distinguish where someone crosses the line. Never let anyone mistreat you by assertively taking care of yourself.
The most important relationship you will ever build in life is the one with yourself. Therefore, only your opinion should run your life. All the rest are just marginal subjective opinions that will affect you only if you let them. So be sure to filtrate what comes your way.