Online Dating Tips
Few of my friends despise anything connected to online technologies. Some of them don’t even have any of the social networks available today! Weird, huh? And I must point out that all of them are still single.
On the other hand, few of my friends who embraced modern technologies and tried one of its tools (a.k.a. online dating) are now happily married or in a steady relationship.
I am not writing this to say first group is completely wrong and second is completely right. I am just pointing out what I’ve noticed in my immediate vicinity.
If you asked my opinion about online dating, I would say this is a great tool. However, it is not a flawless and easygoing tool. It should be approached with wisdom and caution.
So, let’s see what are positive and what are negative sides of online dating.
Cons of online dating
- You can’t be sure who is at the other side of keyboard. In the beginning the communication can go smooth. But keep in mind it takes time for people to show their real face and intention. That is why you should never come to a firm conclusion what you think about the other person too soon. Investing time and energy into online communication is a must if you are serious in finding the right person. And remember, if your gut feeling says something is wrong in the beginning, then probably something is wrong and be sure to listen to that voice. So being careful is crucial.
- Some people start conversation and disappear without a word. That means the person is immature and frivolous. Consider yourself lucky to get rid of this person in a quick and easy way. Don’t take it personally, they are jerks and it has nothing to do with you.
- Too much expectation can lead to a great disappointment. It is better to always be open minded and willing to meet new and interesting person instead of desperately wanting to find love. Easy going approach is a great way to have fun in online dating experience.
- False representation is one of the major down sides of internet dating. So many people lie and deceive others because they are not sorted in their minds. If you want to find love online than honesty is the best policy.
- Meeting a lot of „wrong“ people can be demoralizing. This can lead to frustration and eventually giving up. But just like anything in life, this also falls into a category of trying over and over again and never giving up.
Pros of online dating
- People behind the screen can relax and be much more open and honest. That can lead to a great communication and make you more interesting to the other person, assuming that you are not pretending to be something you are not. When meeting someone face to face, it can create a certain discomfort which can lead to problems in communication if you are a person who has problems in face to face meetings. This way, having someone talking to you with letters on the screen instead of looking in the other person’s eyes, can be safer. In time you can start trusting the other person and when you finally meet in person, there will be no awkward moments.
- You can give yourself time to meet someone properly. With proper communication you can set boundaries and talk in a relaxed manner, not letting anyone to pressure you to do anything you don’t want too soon. When someone starts asking you out after few exchanged messages, that is a sign you are dealing with impatient person. The good thing is that it is also a sign that this person will not respect your wishes and boundaries. You can see a lot of things about the other person only through typing messages in the beginning. That is why it is important not to rush into anything too soon so that you can get a clue who’s behind the other end of conversation.
- Possibilities of meeting the right person isn’t limited to a geographic area. Although having someone around is an advantage, would you really write off “the right person” if he lived 100 miles away and replaced him for incompatible person who lives nearby? Online dating is a worldwide love making machine, which means your possibilities to find the right person are much higher.
Online dating can be frustrating, annoying, boring, stressful and disappointing. But also, it can be fun, interesting and a good chance to meet the right person in today’s detached and isolated times from sociological point of few. Give yourself all the opportunities to meet the love of your life, but be sure to:
- Always approach online dating with caution. Keep in mind you don’t know who is on the other side and what their intentions are so be sure to share information about you very wisely (a.k.a. reveal nothing that can put you in danger, like giving your home address, personal information or even interesting facts such you being an inheritor of your rich uncle).
- If you are setting up a date, always do it in a public area with a lot of people and no possibility of misdeed such as kidnapping or attack.
- Read everything that is written very carefully and try to read between the lines. We all have that little voice that is called intuition and we should use it more often instead of neglecting it when it says “pay attention, this ain’t right”.